What I want you to know. Which is everything.

Monday, May 15, 2006

The Apocalypse...I Mean, End of School is Nigh

The End* is near and there are signs all over the place. In an effort to help my readers better understand when their own end is near I've compiled a list of occurrences and observations of my own, and you can compare these items with what's going on in your life:

(*The end of school, not the apocalypse)

  • You accidentally hurt yourself and you secretly hope it requires immediate, medical attention.

  • After three o'clock is not for anything other than what I call "Summer Practice" as in practicing for summer, not practice that happens during the summer.

  • High gas prices notwithstanding, weekends are spent driving far distances.

  • Dinging bells send you into convulsions.

  • Time out is for you, not them.

  • Much of your time is spent meditating on a certain small central Texas town and the service which they provide.

  • More time is spent making use of said service

  • Work is a misnomer

  • You see the Four Horsemen of the apocalypse and just laugh (Again, still talking about the end of school.)

  • You find yourself saying things like, "Go tell your principal what I called you. See if I care."

  • You watch The Office and think, "Office jobs sound like fun."

  • Review week is more like two.


  • And last but not least

  • You reconsider your position on capital punishment.
  • 2 comments:

    ML said...

    Oh, yeah. I hear you, Son. I'm counting down. For now until the end, (of school not the Apocalypse) in elementary school, we are doing no more than baby sitting. My grades are going to be turned in by Friday. So what I have to finish grading is all the work I'm going to grade. Of course we don't tell the kids that bit of news.
    And yes, "time out is for you, not them". However, I still sent a kid to the office today.

    It can't get here too soon.

    Chad said...

    You know the end is near when...

    educational learning amounts to watching Madagascar and having the students point out all the biological and ecological impossibilities in the movie.

    you consider hard work sending a student to the vending machine for you.

    I'm looking forward to the end of the year as well.